Watch out for conflicts: Remain as positive as possible

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Have you ever get to an argument with someone? Or sometimes do you wish that you can control their thoughts easily so that they will agree to everything you said?

Conflicts starts when you fail to establish a positive communication to the people around you. There are different kinds of people who has multiple experiences rather than you. These ones has their own stories to tell, mindsets or ideals in which we can never control because changing their perceptions might be challenging for them but on the brighter side, you are the one who have the power to control your own temper and attitude. Take a moment of silence whenever you share a conversation to everyone and don’t let their words affect you. Using foul languages, backstabbing, and disrespecting a certain person will only create conflicts that will have a huge effect not only to your mental health but communication aspects too.

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The good news is that you can avoid possible disputes if you are honest and kind to anyone you meet. Be gentle with your words but show traces of strong conviction whenever you say your opinions and suggestions in which people will see you not as an arrogant one but respectful and competent enough to declare your sentiments which it will not turn out as offensive and insensitive for others. Explaining your side properly without being rude and treats everyone with respect is a good bonus factor to engage a healthy relationship to anyone. Do not shove into anyone’s faces about your status, diploma and what you achieve in life because in the work field, adults do not really mind your past credentials because what’s important for them is how you behave towards your co-workers and do your assigned tasks accurately. Respect should not also be executed only in the corporate environment, but also to the people you meet everyday like your neighbors, friends, and especially loved ones.

There are reasons why conflicts exists in the workplace. Being an adult means admitting the fact that you cannot please everyone. Everybody will always have their eyes focused on you whether your actions are good and bad. There are people who will take advantage of your naivety and innocence like giving you orders constantly and then shouts at you for the errors you have caused. According to Business news daily, poor communication is the root cause of workplace conflicts. However, there are some underlying factors too like harassment, increase in workload, lack of skills or training, unrealistic expectations and many more. (

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And another thing, social media is not a platform for you to vent out inner frustrations against an individual for it invokes nothing but hatred, fear and trauma to the attacked person because many people will see your posts on social media. A lot of them will sympathize with you without even listening to the other side of the story. You may gain an upper hand in receiving their support but it will not be the same for other one which can lead to the person’s demise if you choose social media over personal talks. But if you do not want to have a face to face confrontation, you can just send a personal message to him/her and clarify all the misunderstandings in your argument. In that way, you can gain trust and a new companion as well if you express your sincerity in your words.

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In an article namely, “4 Effective Ways to Prevent, De-escalate, or Resolve Conflict Through Better Communication”, from Forbes Books, these are the ways to resolve conflicts easily and to defeat poor communication that destroys a person’s initiative to have an optimistic communication to anyone:

1. Cultivate genuine compassion.

Enforce empathy not just sympathy for others, meaning listen and appreciate everyone’s suggestions when collaborating on a project because you work as a team. Brainstorming is useful to develop connections with one another and increase an individual’s interest in cooperating more within the group. Continue accepting their ideas with an open mind and once you come up with a decision on what to do with your project, tell them politely if their ideas are acceptable or not afterwards.

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2. Be inquisitive.

Loudest people may have the aura to capture everyone’s interest because of their overflowing confidence to speak their goals or motives who can influence anyone to agree on their plans. Having these people will surely liven up the mood in meetings and they can also give great ideas for the group’s presentations but you also need to treat everyone with fair treatment or in other words : equality. The quiet ones or the people who loves to work silently has also the best ideas for they are always thinking about the possible scenarios that the team will experience in the later run. Expressing their ideas in a crowd may not be their forte, but you can rely on them about the logics and solutions that will benefit the team.

3. Listen carefully to understand (not to respond).

Interrupting someone during a meeting or a presentation even though they are not fully finished yet in their discussion, is a sign of an impolite behavior. If the person requires a question and answer portion after his/her report, then listen to him/her wholeheartedly throughout the discussion. Save your feedbacks and judgments later if the person says that the floor is open for questions. You can ruin someone’s hard work and efforts if you intervene in the middle of a forum and the person will possibly give you a displeasing impression, which will be a primary origin for conflicts.  

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Moreover, conflicts are really common and can be seen as normal in the “adulting” industry. Like what I said, you cannot please everyone and that is perfectly okay. The only thing that matters is that you do not forget this word : RESPECT. This is a moral behavior that everybody must possess. We may have different personalities and beliefs but respecting their opinions and using compassionate words to educate and avoid heated arguments are good acts to make them realize that you are kindhearted and genuine at the same time. And even if they still continue to raise their eyebrows at you, give them a delicate smile and a brief answer that will make them comprehend that you are professional and earned their respects.

(If you want to keep a healthy relationship with your peers, colleague, co-workers and many more, check out this link :


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